Why are abusive people so controlling?

I was with an abusive man for years. At first he was the sweetest guy you have ever met then he started to change. When I first met him I was really in shape. I was a fitness fanatic. I would get my hair and nails done on a regular basis and this would anger him. When I would buy new clothes for myself he would fly off the handle. He hated the fact I was on birth control. When I wanted to wear contacts instead of glasses he tried his hardest to convince me to wear my glasses instead.